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Chapter 57 Albeit, gentle reader, I have lusted earnestly, and endeavoured carefully (according to the measure of such a slender skill as God has vouchsafed me, and as convenient leisure from other occasions of needful profit and healthful pastime have permitted) that these little books which I here put into thy hands, might stand instead of many bigger booksyet have I carried myself towards thee in such fanciful guise of careless disport, that right sore am I ashamed now to intreat thy lenity seriouslyin beseeching thee to believe it of me, that in the story of my father and his christian-namesI have no thoughts of treading upon Francis the Firstnor in the affair of the noseupon Francis the Ninthnor in the character of my uncle Tobyof characterizing the militiating spirits of my countrythe wound upon his groin, is a wound to every comparison of that kindnor by Trimthat I meant the duke of Ormondor that my book is wrote against predestination, or free-will, or taxesIf tis wrote against any thing, tis wrote, an please your worships, against the spleen! in order, by a more frequent and a more convulsive elevation and depression of the diaphragm, and the succussations of the intercostal and abdominal muscles in laughter, to drive the gall and other bitter juices from the gall- bladder, liver, and sweet-bread of his majestys subjects, with all the inimicitious passions which belong to them, down into their duodenums. |
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