rotting corpse, seasoned with butter, provides a meal for the crows and a subject for one of the most moving soliloquies ever given by a skinny parisian urchin boy.

Mick Jagger is miscast as an Irish local who decides to impersonate an Australian Gangster (explaining the accent! ) to claim on the gangsters lottery ticket. It all goes wrong when the lottery board twig his plan and a horrific shoot out ensues with "Ned" trying to escape down the lavatory only to discover that in Neds primitive hovel it is only a bucket, this jams on his head and he staggers out of the door so equipped to meet his doom in a hail of bullets.

A musical about seven brothers who rescue a Mexican village from the hands of bandits then steal the seven prettiest girls and take them off to their snowbound hillbilly home pursued by the village elders whom they'd so recently rescued. Starring a bald Howard Keel as Adam & Yul Brynner with ginger hair and beard as third brother but gun slinging leader Chris.

Stars Gene Kelly as a cocky, overconfident young black singer raised in Minneapolis. Debbie Reynolds plays the love interest Apollonia. Essentially a glorified music video, this film is in fact more famous to the British public through the Morecambe & Wise sketch in which the duo with big over-moussed hair and lots of eyeliner, dressed in ruffled shirts & funky ankle boots sing and dance there way through the films title hit & also the million selling song "Bring me Sunshine, bring me Purple Rain".

A surrealist film from 1923 made by Dali and a very young (pre-foetal) John Cleese, in which Jesus is transported into the future (loosing his sandal along the way) where he becomes a small goldfish living with other Prophets from different eras (calling themselves the People's Front of the Fish Tank and becoming strongly opposed to the Fish Tank People's Front) in a fish tank in North London circa 1985. He is then promptly eaten by a psychotic American actor trying to outdo British wackiness, and failing.

Adapted from a Stephen King story. A clairvoyant gangster (Christopher Walken) gets given one last job by a wheelchair bound underworld boss (Christopher Walken). When the job goes wrong, Walken puts a contract out on himself in order to stop Martin Sheen from electing Steve Buschemi as President. Perhaps.

And remember... if you have any ideas for a movie or book hybrid of your own, send it to competitions@bibliomania.com.