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In the restaurants cabbage soup, mutton with kasha, sturgeon, beer, no more Asiaticism, but Russia, real Russia. The passengers in the train would talk about trade, new singers, the Franco-Russian entente; on all sides there would be the feeling of keen, cultured, intellectual, eager life. Hasten on, on! At last Nevsky Prospect, and Great Morskaya Street, and then Kovensky Place, where he used to live at one time when he was a student, the dear grey sky, the drizzling rain, the drenched cabmen. Ivan Andreitch! some one called from the next room. Are you at home? Im here, Laevsky responded. What do you want? Papers. Laevsky got up languidly, feeling giddy, walked into the other room, yawning and shuffling with his slippers. There, at the open window that looked into the street, stood one of his young fellow-clerks, laying out some government documents on the window-sill. One minute, my dear fellow, Laevsky said softly, and he went to look for the ink; returning to the window, he signed the papers without looking at them, and said: Its hot! Yes. Are you coming to-day? I dont think so. Im not quite well. Tell Sheshkovsky that I will come and see him after dinner. The clerk went away. Laevsky lay down on his sofa again and began thinking: And so I must weigh all the circumstances and reflect on them. Before I go away from here I ought to pay up my debts. I owe about two thousand roubles. I have no money. Of course, thats not important; I shall pay part now, somehow, and I shall send the rest, later, from Petersburg. The chief point is Nadyezhda Fyodorovna. First of all we must define our relations. Yes. A little later he was considering whether it would not be better to go to Samoylenko for advice. I might go, he thought, but what use would there be in it? I shall only say something inappropriate about boudoirs, about women, about what is honest or dishonest. Whats the use of talking about what is honest or dishonest, if I must make haste to save my life, if I am suffocating in this cursed slavery and am killing myself? One must realise at last that to go on leading the life I do is something so base and so cruel that everything else seems petty and trivial beside it. To run away, he muttered, sitting down, to run away. The deserted seashore, the insatiable heat, and the monotony of the smoky lilac mountains, ever the same and silent, everlastingly solitary, overwhelmed him with depression, and, as it were, made him drowsy and sapped his energy. He was perhaps very clever, talented, remarkably honest; perhaps if the sea and the mountains had not closed him in on all sides, he might have become an excellent Zemstvo leader, a statesman, an orator, a political writer, a saint. Who knows? If so, was it not stupid to argue whether it were honest or dishonest when a gifted and useful manan artist or musician, for instanceto escape from prison, breaks a wall and deceives his jailers? Anything is honest when a man is in such a position. At two oclock Laevsky and Nadyezhda Fyodorovna sat down to dinner. When the cook gave them rice and tomato soup, Laevsky said: The same thing every day. Why not have cabbage soup? There are no cabbages. |
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