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One day the monk appeared at dinner-time and sat in the dining-room window. Kovrin was delighted, and very adroitly began a conversation with Yegor Semyonitch and Tanya of what might be of interest to the monk; the black-robed visitor listened and nodded his head graciously, and Yegor Semyonitch and Tanya listened, too, and smiled gaily without suspecting that Kovrin was not talking to them but to his hallucination. Imperceptibly the fast of the Assumption was approaching, and soon after came the wedding, which, at Yegor Semyonitchs urgent desire, was celebrated with a flourishthat is, with senseless festivities that lasted for two whole days and nights. Three thousand roublesworth of food and drink was consumed, but the music of the wretched hired band, the noisy toasts, the scurrying to and fro of the footmen, the uproar and crowding, prevented them from appreciating the taste of the expensive wines and wonderful delicacies ordered from Moscow. VII One long winter night Kovrin was lying in bed, reading a French novel. Poor Tanya, who had headaches in the evenings from living in town, to which she was not accustomed, had been asleep a long while, and, from time to time, articulated some incoherent phrase in her restless dreams. It struck three oclock. Kovrin put out the light and lay down to sleep, lay for a long time with his eyes closed, but could not get to sleep because, as he fancied, the room was very hot and Tanya talked in her sleep. At half-past four he lighted the candle again, and this time he saw the black monk sitting in an arm-chair near the bed. Good-morning, said the monk, and after a brief pause he asked: What are you thinking of now? Of fame, answered Kovrin. In the French novel I have just been reading, there is a description of a young savant, who does silly things and pines away through worrying about fame. I cant understand such anxiety. Because you are wise. Your attitude towards fame is one of indifference, as towards a toy which no longer interests you. Yes, that is true. Renown does not allure you now. What us there flattering, amusing, or edifying in their carving your name on a tombstone, then time rubbing off the inscription together with the gilding? Moreover, happily there are too many of you for the weak memory of mankind to be able to retain your names. Of course, assented Kovrin. Besides, why should they be remembered? But let us talk of something else. Of happiness, for instance. What is happiness? When the clock struck five, he was sitting on the bed, dangling his feet to the carpet, talking to the monk: In ancient times a happy man grew at last frightened of his happinessit was so great!and to propitiate the gods he brought as a sacrifice his favourite ring. Do you know, I, too, like Polykrates, begin to be uneasy of my happiness. It seems strange to me that from morning to night I feel nothing but joy; it fills my whole being and smothers all other feelings. I dont know what sadness, grief, or boredom is. Here I am not asleep; I suffer from sleeplessness, but I am not dull. I say it in earnest; I begin to feel perplexed. But why? the monk asked in wonder. Is joy a supernatural feeling? Ought it not to be the normal state of man? The more highly a man is developed on the intellectual and moral side, the more independent he is, the more pleasure life gives him. Socrates, Diogenes, and Marcus Aurelius, were joyful, not sorrowful. And the Apostle tells us: Rejoice continually; Rejoice and be glad. |
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