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listened to him with envy. I felt greatly drawn to the rehearsals, but I could not bring myself to go to the Azhogins. A week before Christmas Dr. Blagovo arrived. And again we argued and played billiards in the evenings. When he played he used to take off his coat and unbutton his shirt over his chest, and for some reason tried altogether to assume the air of a desperate rake. He did not drink much, but made a great uproar about it, and had a special faculty for getting through twenty roubles in an evening at such a poor cheap tavern as the Volga. My sister began coming to see me again; they both expressed surprise every time on seeing each other, but from her joyful, guilty face it was evident that these meetings were not accidental. One evening, when we were playing billiards, the doctor said to me: I say, why dont you go and see Miss Dolzhikov? You dont know Mariya Viktorovna; she is a clever creature, a charmer, a simple, good-natured soul. I described how her father had received me in the spring. Nonsense! laughed the doctor, the engineers one thing and shes another. Really, my dear fellow, you mustnt be nasty to her; go and see her sometimes. For instance, lets go and see her tomorrow evening. What do you say? He persuaded me. The next evening I put on my new serge trousers, and in some agitation I set off to Miss Dolzhikovs. The footman did not seem so haughty and terrible, nor the furniture so gorgeous, as on that morning when I had come to ask a favour. Mariya Viktorovna was expecting me, and she received me like an old acquaintance, shaking hands with me in a friendly way. She was wearing a grey cloth dress with full sleeves, and had her hair done in the style which we used to call dogs ears, when it came into fashion in the town a year before. The hair was combed down over the ears, and this made Mariya Viktorovnas face look broader, and she seemed to me this time very much like her father, whose face was broad and red, with something in its expression like a sledge-driver. She was handsome and elegant, but not youthful looking; she looked thirty, though in reality she was not more than twenty-five. Dear Doctor, how grateful I am to you, she said, making me sit down. If it hadnt been for him you wouldnt have come to see me. I am bored to death! My father has gone away and left me alone, and I dont know what to do with myself in this town. Then she began asking me where I was working now, how much I earned, where I lived. Do you spend on yourself nothing but what you earn? she asked. No. Happy man! she sighed. All the evil in life, it seems to me, comes from idleness, boredom, and spiritual emptiness, and all this is inevitable when one is accustomed to living at other peoples expense. Dont think I am showing off, I tell you truthfully: it is not interesting or pleasant to be rich. Make to yourselves friends of the mammon of unrighteousness is said, because there is not and cannot be a mammon thats righteous. She looked round at the furniture with a grave, cold expression, as though she wanted to count it over, and went on: Comfort and luxury have a magical power; little by little they draw into their clutches even strong-willed people. At one time father and I lived simply, not in a rich style, but now you see how! It is something monstrous, she said, shrugging her shoulders; we spend up to twenty thousand a year! In the provinces! |
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