“Snacks!” said Mr. Pullwool.

At this brazen word Mr. Dicker’s countenance fell again; he was ashamed to talk so frankly about plundering his fellow-citizens: “a little grain of conscience turned him sour.”

“I will take pay for whatever I can do as a lawyer,” he stammered.

“Get out!” laughed the Satanic one. “You just take all there is a-going! You need it bad enough. I know when a man’s hard up. I know the signs. I’ve been as bad off as you; had to look all ways for five dollars; had to play second fiddle and say thanky. But what I offer you ain’t a second fiddle. It’s as good a chance as my own. Even divides. One half to you and one half to me. You know the people and I know the ropes. It’s a fair bargain. What do you say?”

Mr. Dicker thought of his decayed practice and his unpaid bills, and flipping overboard his little grain of conscience, he said, “Snacks.”

“All right,” grinned Pullwool, his teeth gleaming alarmingly. “Word of a gentleman,” he added, extending his pulpy hand, loaded with ostentatious rings, and grasping Dicker’s recoiling fingers. “Harness up your little bill as quick as you can, and drive it like Jehu. Fastburg to be the only capital. Slowburg no claims at all, historical, geographical, or economic. The old arrangement a humbug; as inconvenient as a fifth wheel of a coach; cost the State thousands of greenbacks every year. Figure it all up statistically and dab it over with your shiniest rhetoric and make a big thing of it every way. That’s what you’ve got to do; that’s your little biz. I’ll tend to the rest.”

“I don’t quite see where the money is to come from,” observed Mr. Dicker.

“Leave that to me,” said the veteran of the lobbies; “my name is Pullwool, and I know how to pull the wool over men’s eyes, and then I know how to get at their breeches-pockets. You bring in your bill and make your speech. Will you do it?”

“Yes,” answered Dicker, bolting all scruples in another half tumbler of brandy.

He kept his word. As promptly as parliamentary forms and mysteries would allow, there was a bill under the astonished noses of honourable law-givers, removing the seat of legislation from Slowburg and centring it in Fastburg. This bill Mr. Thomas Dicker supported with that fluency and fiery enthusiasm of oratory which had for a time enabled him to show as the foremost man of his State. Great was the excitement, great the rejoicing and anger. The press of Fastburg sent forth shrieks of exultation, and the press of Slowburg responded with growlings of disgust. The two capitals and the two geographical sections which they represented were ready to fire Parrott guns at each other, without regard to life and property in the adjoining regions of the earth. If there was a citizen of the little Commonwealth who did not hear of this bill and did not talk of it, it was because that citizen was as deaf as a post and as dumb as an oyster. Ordinary political distinctions were forgotten, and the old party-whips could not manage their very wheel- horses, who went snorting and kicking over the traces in all directions. In short, both in the legislature and out of it, nothing was thought of but the question of the removal of the capital.

Among the loudest of the agitators was Mr. Pullwool; not that he cared one straw whether the capital went to Fastburg, or to Slowburg, or to Ballyhack; but for the money which he thought he saw in the agitation he did care mightily, and to get that money he laboured with a zeal which was not of this world alone. At the table of his hotel, and in the bar-room of the same institution, and in the lobbies of the legislative hall, and in editorial sanctums and barber’s shops, and all other nooks of gossip, he trumpeted the claims of Fastburg as if that little city were the New Jerusalem and deserved to be the metropolis of the sidereal universe. All sorts of trickeries, too: he sent spurious telegrams and got fictitious items into the newspapers; he lied through every medium known to the highest civilisation. Great surely was his success, for the row which he raised was tremendous. But a row alone was not enough; it was the mere breeze upon the surface of the waters; the treasure-ship below was still to be drawn up and gutted.