Act II

SCENE I.—A Room in PINCHWIFE’S House

Mrs. MARGERY PINCHWIFE and ALITHEA. PINCHWIFE

peeping behind at the door.

Mrs. Pinch. Pray, sister, where are the best fields and woods to walk in, in London?

Alith.[aside]. A pretty question!—[Aloud.] Why, sister, Mulberry Garden and St. James’s Park; and, for close walks, the New Exchange.

Mrs. Pinch. Pray, sister, tell me why my husband looks so grum here in town, and keeps me up so close, and will not let me go a-walking, nor let me wear my best gown yesterday.

Alith. O, he’s jealous, sister.

Mrs. Pinch. Jealous! what’s that?

Alith. He’s afraid you should love another man.

Mrs. Pinch. How should he be afraid of my loving another man, when he will not let me see any but himself!

Alith. Did he not carry you yesterday to a play?

Mrs. Pinch. Ay; but we sat amongst ugly people. He would not let me come near the gentry, who sat under us, so that I could not see ’em. He told me, none but naughty women sat there, whom they toused and moused. But I would have ventured, for all that.

Alith. But how did you like the play?

Mrs. Pinch. Indeed I was weary of the play; but I liked hugeously the actors. They are the goodliest, properest men, sister!

Alith. O, but you must not like the actors, sister.

Mrs. Pinch. Ay, how should I help it, sister? Pray, sister, when my husband comes in, will you ask leave for me to go a-walking?

Alith. A-walking! ha! ha! Lord, a country-gentlewoman’s pleasure is the drudgery of a footpost; and she requires as much airing as her husband’s horses.—[Aside.] But here comes your husband: I’ll ask, though I’m sure he’ll not grant it.

Mrs. Pinch. He says he won’t let me go abroad for fear of catching the pox.

Alith. Fy! the small-pox you should say.

Enter PINCHWIFE.

Mrs. Pinch. O my dear, dear bud, welcome home! Why dost thou look so fropish? who has nangered thee?

Pinch. You’re a fool. [Mrs. PINCHWIFE goes aside, and cries.

Alith. Faith, so she is, for crying for no fault, poor tender creature!