Sir J. The ladies! Come, will you sit down? Give us some wine, fellow. You won’t smoke?

Con. No, nor drink neither, at this time; I must ask your pardon.

Sir J. What, this mistress of your’s runs in your head? I’ll warrant, it’s some such squeamish minx as my wife, that’s grown so dainty of late, she finds fault even with a dirty shirt.

Heart. That a woman may do, and not be very dainty neither.

Sir J. Come, you shall take one glass, though I send for a box of lozenges, to sweeten your mouth after it.

Con. Nay, if one glass will satisfy you, I’ll drink it, without putting you to that expense.

Sir J. Why, that’s honest. So, here’s to you, gentlemen. A wife’s the devil. To your both being married.

[They drink.

Heart. Oh! your most humble servant, sir.

Sir J. Well, how do you like my wine?

Con. ’Tis very good, indeed.

Heart ’Tis admirable.

Sir J. Then take t’other glass.

Con. No, pray, excuse us now: we’ll come another time, and then we won’t spare it.

Sir J. This one glass, and no more. Come, it shall be your mistress’s health; and that’s a great compliment from me, I assure you.

Con. And ’tis a very obliging one to me; so give us the glasses.

Sir J. So, let her live—

[Coughs in the glass.

Heart. And be kind.

Con. What’s the matter? Does it go the wrong way?

Sir J. If I had love enough to be jealous, I should take this for an ill omen; for I never drunk my wife’s health in my life, but I puked in my glass.

Con. Oh! she’s too virtuous to make any reasonable man jealous.

Sir J. Pox of her virtue. If I could catch her adulterating, I might be divorced from her by law.

Heart. And so pay her a yearly pension, to be a distinguished cuckold.

Enter a Servant.

Serv. Sir, there’s my Lord Rake, Colonel Bully, and some other gentlemen at the Blue Posts, desire your company.

Sir J. Gadso! we are to consult about playing the devil to-night.