[Points to the closet.

Chas. Surf. Oh, ’fore Heaven, I’ll have him out. Sir Peter, come forth!

Jos. Surf. No, no—

Chas. Surf. I say, Sir Peter, come into court.—[Pulls in Sir Peter.] What! my old guardian!—What!—turn inquisitor, and take evidence, incog.? Oh, fie! Oh, fie!

Sir Pet. Give me your hand, Charles—I believe I have suspected you wrongfully; but you mustn’t be angry with Joseph—’twas my plan!

Chas. Surf. Indeed!

Sir Pet. But I acquit you. I promise you I don’t think near so ill of you as I did. What I have heard has given me great satisfaction.

Chas. Surf. Egad, then, ’twas lucky you didn’t hear any more. Wasn’t it, Joseph?

Sir Pet. Ah! you would have retorted on him.

Chas. Surf. Ah, ay, that was a joke.

Sir Pet. Yes, yes, I know his honour too well.

Chas. Surf. But you might as well have suspected him as me in this matter, for all that. Mightn’t he, Joseph?

Sir Pet. Well, well, I believe you.

Jos. Surf. Would they were both out of the room!

[Aside.

Sir Pet. And in future, perhaps, we may not be such strangers.

Re-enter Servant and whispers Joseph Surface.

Serv. Lady Sneerwell is below, and says she will come up.

Jos. Surf. Lady Sneerwell! Gad’s life! she must not come here. [Exit Servant.] Gentlemen, I beg pardon—I must wait on you downstairs; here is a person come on particular business.

Chas. Surf. Well, you can see him in another room. Sir Peter and I have not met a long time, and I have something to say to him.

Jos. Surf. [Aside.] They must not be left together.—[Aloud.] I’ll send Lady Sneerwell away, and return directly.—[Aside to Sir Peter.] Sir Peter, not a word of the French milliner.

Sir Pet. [Aside to Joseph Surface.] I! not for the world!—[Exit Joseph Surface.] Ah, Charles, if you associated more with your brother, one might indeed hope for your reformation. He is a man of sentiment. Well, there is nothing in the world so noble as a man of sentiment.

Chas. Surf. Psha! he is too moral by half; and so apprehensive of his good name, as he calls it, that I suppose he would as soon let a priest into his house as a wench.