Act 2 - Scene 3
The Grecian camp. Before Achilles' tent.
Enter THERSITES, solus THERSITES
How now, Thersites! what lost in the labyrinth of thy fury! Shall the elephant Ajax carry it thus? He beats
me, and I rail at him: O, worthy satisfaction! would it were otherwise; that I could beat him, whilst he railed
at me. 'Sfoot, I'll learn to conjure and raise devils, but I'll see some issue of my spiteful execrations. Then
there's Achilles, a rare enginer! If Troy be not taken till these two undermine it, the walls will stand till they
fall of themselves. O thou great thunder-darter of Olympus, forget that thou art Jove, the king of gods
and, Mercury, lose all the serpentine craft of thy caduceus, if ye take not that little, little less than little wit
from them that they have! which short-armed ignorance itself knows is so abundant scarce, it will not in
circumvention deliver a fly from a spider, without drawing their massy irons and cutting the web. After this,
the vengeance on the whole camp! or rather, the bone-ache! for that, methinks, is the curse dependent
on those that war for a placket. I have said my prayers and devil Envy say Amen. What ho! my Lord
Achilles!
Enter PATROCLUS PATROCLUS
Who's there? Thersites! Good Thersites, come in and rail. THERSITES
If I could have remembered a gilt counterfeit, thou wouldst not have slipped out of my contemplation: but it
is no matter; thyself upon thyself! The common curse of mankind, folly and ignorance, be thine in great
revenue! heaven bless thee from a tutor, and discipline come not near thee! Let thy blood be thy direction
till thy death! then if she that lays thee out says thou art a fair corse, I'll be sworn and sworn upon't she
never shrouded any but lazars. Amen. Where's Achilles? PATROCLUS
What, art thou devout? wast thou in prayer? THERSITES
Ay: the heavens hear me!
Enter ACHILLES ACHILLES
Who's there? PATROCLUS
Thersites, my lord. ACHILLES
Where, where? Art thou come? why, my cheese, my digestion, why hast thou not served thyself in to my
table so many meals? Come, what's Agamemnon?
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By PanEris
using Melati.
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