if you like, and talk about anything in the world, except the Royal Academy,° Mrs Cheveley, or novels in Scotch dialect. They are not improving subjects. (Catches sight of something that is lying on the sofa half hidden by the cushion) What is this? Someone has dropped a diamond brooch!° Quite beautiful, isn’t it? (Shows it to him.) I wish it was mine, but Gertrude won’t let me wear anything but pearls, and I am thoroughly sick of pearls. They make one look so plain, so good and so intellectual. I wonder whom the brooch belongs to.

Lord Goring I wonder who dropped it.

Mabel Chiltern It is a beautiful brooch.

Lord Goring It is a handsome bracelet.

Mabel Chiltern It isn’t a bracelet. It’s a brooch.

Lord Goring It can be used as a bracelet.

Takes it from her, and pulling out a green letter-case,° puts the ornament carefully in it, and replaces the whole thing in his breast-pocket with the most perfect sangfroid

Mabel Chiltern What are you doing?

Lord Goring Miss Mabel, I am going to make a rather strange request to you.

Mabel Chiltern (eagerly) Oh, pray do! I have been waiting for it all the evening.

Lord Goring (is a little taken aback, but recovers himself) Don’t mention to anybody that I have taken charge of this brooch. Should anyone write and claim it, let me know at once.

Mabel Chiltern That is a strange request.

Lord Goring Well, you see I gave this brooch to somebody once, years ago.

Mabel Chiltern You did?

Lord Goring Yes.

Lady Chiltern enters alone. The other guests have gone

Mabel Chiltern Then I shall certainly bid you good night. Good night, Gertrude!

Exit

Lady Chiltern Good night, dear! (To Lord Goring) You saw whom Lady Markby brought here tonight?

Lord Goring Yes. It was an unpleasant surprise. What did she come here for?

Lady Chiltern Apparently to try and lure Robert to uphold some fraudulent scheme in which she is interested. The Argentine Canal, in fact.

Lord Goring She has mistaken her man, hasn’t she?

Lady Chiltern She is incapable of understanding an upright nature like my husband’s!

Lord Goring Yes. I should fancy she came to grief if she tried to get Robert into her toils. It is extraordinary what astounding mistakes clever women make.