Mrs Cheveley So do I. Fathers have so much to learn from their sons nowadays.

Lady Markby Really, dear? What?

Mrs Cheveley The art of living. The only really Fine Art we have produced in modern times.

Lady Markby (shaking her head) Ah! I am afraid Lord Brancaster knew a good deal about that. More than his poor wife ever did. (Turning to Lady Chiltern) You know Lady Brancaster, don’t you, dear?

Lady Chiltern Just slightly. She was staying at Langton last autumn, when we were there.

Lady Markby Well, like all stout women, she looks the very picture of happiness, as no doubt you noticed. But there are many tragedies in her family, besides this affair of the curate. Her own sister, Mrs Jekyll, had a most unhappy life; through no fault of her own, I am sorry to say. She ultimately was so broken- hearted that she went into a convent, or on to the operatic stage,° I forget which. No; I think it was decorative art-needlework she took up. I know she had lost all sense of pleasure in life. (Rising) And now, Gertrude, if you will allow me, I shall leave Mrs Cheveley in your charge and call back for her in a quarter of an hour. Or perhaps, dear Mrs Cheveley, you wouldn’t mind waiting in the carriage while I am with Lady Brancaster. As I intend it to be a visit of condolence, I shan’t stay long.

Mrs Cheveley (rising) I don’t mind waiting in the carriage at all, provided there is somebody to look at one.

Lady Markby Well, I hear the curate is always prowling about the house.

Mrs Cheveley I am afraid I am not fond of girl friends.°

Lady Chiltern (rising) Oh, I hope Mrs Cheveley will stay here a little. I should like to have a few minutes’ conversation with her.

Mrs Cheveley How very kind of you, Lady Chiltern! Believe me, nothing would give me greater pleasure.

Lady Markby Ah! no doubt you both have many pleasant reminiscences of your schooldays to talk over together. Good-bye, dear Gertrude! Shall I see you at Lady Bonar’s tonight? She has discovered a wonderful new genius. He does … nothing at all, I believe. That is a great comfort, is it not?

Lady Chiltern Robert and I are dining at home by ourselves tonight, and I don’t think I shall go anywhere afterwards. Robert, of course, will have to be in the House. But there is nothing interesting on.

Lady Markby Dining at home by yourselves? Is that quite prudent? Ah, I forgot, your husband is an exception. Mine is the general rule, and nothing ages a woman so rapidly as having married the general rule.

Exit Lady Markby

Mrs Cheveley Wonderful woman, Lady Markby, isn’t she? Talks more and says less than anybody I ever met. She is made to be a public speaker. Much more so than her husband, though he is a typical Englishman, always dull and usually violent.

Lady Chiltern (makes no answer, but remains standing. There is a pause. Then the eyes of the two women meet. Lady Chiltern looks stern and pale. Mrs Cheveley seems rather amused) Mrs Cheveley, I think it is right to tell you quite frankly that, had I known who you really were, I should not have invited you to my house last night.

Mrs Cheveley (with an impertinent smile) Really?