christened if I like. There is no evidence at all that I have ever been christened by anybody. I should think it extremely probable I never was, and so does Dr Chasuble. It is entirely different in your case. You have been christened already.

Algernon Yes, but I have not been christened for years.

Jack Yes, but you have been christened. That is the important thing.

Algernon Quite so. So I know my constitution can stand it. If you are not quite sure about your ever having been christened, I must say I think it rather dangerous your venturing on it now. It might make you very unwell. You can hardly have forgotten that someone very closely connected with you was very nearly carried off this week in Paris by a severe chill.

Jack Yes, but you said yourself that a severe chill was not hereditary.

Algernon It usen’t to be, I know—but I daresay it is now. Science is always making wonderful improvements in things.

Jack (picking up the muffin-dish) Oh, that is nonsense; you are always talking nonsense.

Algernon Jack, you are at the muffins again! I wish you wouldn’t. There are only two left. (Takes them) I told you I was particularly fond of muffins.

Jack But I hate tea-cake.

Algernon Why on earth then do you allow tea-cake to be served up for your guests? What ideas you have of hospitality!

Jack Algernon! I have already told you to go. I don’t want you here. Why don’t you go!

Algernon I haven’t quite finished my tea yet! and there is still one muffin left.

Jack groans, and sinks into a chair. Algernon still continues eating

Act Drop